First Parent Visit

The First Parent Visit is a little nerve racking.

It's one thing to talk to them on the phone, its another to actually meet them in person.

We had supervised parent visits on Monday and Tuesday. 

It was the first time Carson saw his parents since being placed in a foster home.

We took Carson to the main office that we first picked him up at.  Thankfully for us, it is only about 5 minutes from our home.

We arrived right on time and as we walked up the steps to the entrance, Carson's mother was already out the door on the front step to meet us with tears in her eyes. Paul was holding Carson as she reached out to hold him. Carson pushed her away but then grabbed on to her necklace to play with it.  It was awkward as we stood in the entrance way as tears streamed down her face having her moment with him.

We were able to give her privacy as we maneuvered our way into the building to sign-in.  We were able to speak with her for a brief moment and gave her a photo album we put together with pictures of Carson playing at our home.  

Carson's social worker was there to meet/greet us.  He kindly asked us to be back in an hour and showed Carson and his mom into the visitation room.  She had diapers and everything she needed, so we tossed her the stuffed animal that came in the grocery bag his first night and went back home to prepare dinner and clean up our house a bit.

When we went to pick Carson up he walked out of the visitation room smiling and with a new pair of brand name shoes.  His mother thanked us profusely for taking such good care of him.  She mentioned she knew many foster parents who are not good foster parents and she was glad he was with us.  She said a final goodbye as more tears streamed down her face.  I noticed she looked past us and out the glass doors to a man standing across the street.  It was Carson's dad.  The parents cannot have visitations together.  It took us awhile to get Carson in his car seat and as we drove by the sidewalk where they were standing holding each other crying, we waved.

The next day, same time, same place, we met his dad.  He rode his bike a few miles to get there to visit with his son.  Carson had a similar reaction when we handed him over to his father.  He kept him at a distance at first and then as he sat on his dad's lap, he kept glancing at us as we walked away to sign-in.

The social worker was not punctual this time and the security guard and the lady behind the glass-protected front desk told us very loudly to stay and supervise Carson and his dad until the social worker was able to come out.  Another super awkward moment.  We felt so awkward watching them interact like we were intruding on their special time together.  It made us thankful that we did not agree to supervise the visits!  We were so relieved when Carson's social worker came out.  He apologized for his tardiness but he definitely made up for it when at the end of the visit, Carson's dad asked if he could walk us to our car and the social worker followed along as well, which we were more than grateful for!

We gave Carson's dad a duplicate photo album (his own copy) and he thanked us profusely as well.  We made it through our first parent visits, another learning experience and growing opportunity!  We hear with the following visits a social worker will come to our home and pick-up and drop-off Carson as they will be at a local fast-food place or the park.

It is interesting how meeting people face-to-face can increase our compassion for them and how it can encourage us to pray for them all the more fervently, especially when such a precious child is involved.